Primary Thoughts
Neil Mufson, Head of School

As I have been thinking about responsibility, the PDS value for March, and the children’s amazing responses to my question “What is responsibility and what does it look like?” at the recent Beakos, I thought of The New Yorker cartoon from about 10 years ago by Roz Chast entitled “The Dream Remote.” Pictured was a remote control full of buttons related to many day-to-day responsibilities. Beyond buttons for “wake up,” “brush your teeth,” “take out the garbage,” “clean room,” and “do homework,” there were those related to some of the finer points we try to instill in our children – “write thank you note,” “stop picking on your brother or sister,” “pick that up,” “put that down,” and “leave that alone.” 

Of course as we try to teach our children about responsibility, there are no such simple devices. A substitute simply does not exist for a parent’s consistent and steadfast efforts to model, teach, and ultimately instill responsibility. In fact, when we neglect this kind of critical teaching or try to find ways to make it easier for our children to learn and meet their responsibilities, we are short-changing them in the long run. It is only by providing age-appropriate opportunities for this kind of practice that we lower the risk of creating “responsibility-impaired” teens and adults (A decade or so later than the Chast cartoon, what does this February 16’s daily cartoon also from The New Yorker say when it shows a dejected Spiderman sitting at a bar with a man who says, “Listen kid – in the real world, great power comes with no responsibility whatsoever”?)

By the way, opportunities to learn responsibility should not be accompanied by the lure of a reward. We need to build on the intrinsic satisfaction our children feel as they meet their obligations and help themselves, their family, or others. After all, we don’t want our children to become dependent on a reward in order to do the right thing.

Though a simple push of a button on “the dream remote” is indeed tempting, there are no shortcuts to developing responsible, dependable, reliable offspring. Plus, we’d probably have trouble keeping track of the remote anyway.

Respect
Neil Mufson, Head of School

If you’ve seen the brilliant, glowing bulletin board just inside our front door, you know for sure that this month’s Primary Day value is RESPECT. The board makes this keystone practice very concrete by noting some simple ways our young friends can RADIATE RESPECT:

• Follow Beako’s Golden Rule.
• Think before you act.
• Include everyone.
• Treat others with respect.
• Be considerate.
• Listen carefully.
• Be kind.
• Think before you speak.
• Apologize when needed.
• Use polite manners.

This month’s focus on such an important practice reminded me of a small volume I came across a number of years ago called Say Please, Say Thank You: The Respect We Owe One Another. Written by Donald McCullough, a professor of theology, the book focuses entirely on the concept of respect. The author’s central assumption is that “people deserve to be treated with respect, not because they have earned it, not because they are always kind or easy to get along with, but because they are part of something bigger than themselves… they [are part] of humanity.” 

McCullough maintains that if we “Treat one another with a lack of respect, that lack of respect will spread, not only back to you but toward others. Treat one another with the dignity befitting human beings, and that dignity will in turn multiply. Attitudes and actions are as infectious as a mean virus.”

McCullough asserts that by observing simple courtesies, each of us can help turn the course of our society’s rampant incivility. This suggests a natural place to begin with our children. Taking the time to emphasize seemingly small expressions of thoughtfulness – for instance, consistently saying “please” and “thank you” – “can have a big role in creating a more humane humanity.” By teaching our children to make “everyday” courtesies more “everyday,” we teach them to respect others, which strengthens their connection to others and every community of which they are a part. After all, as McCullough writes, “Our lives are built one small brick at a time, ordinary day by ordinary day. With each little expression of thoughtfulness we help create something of immense significance… a manner that acknowledges the worth of human beings.”

The suggestions on our front bulletin board can indeed radiate outward. A more connected, humane, and respectful world can start right here!

"Kind World"
Neil Mufson, Head of School

As we begin a new calendar year, I’d like to return us to the Primary Day value with which we began this academic year: kindness. World events and daily life remind us that there is never a shortage of situations in which kindness is important and potentially transformational. As I have already cited on many occasions, research on kindness shows that no act of kindness is wasted. They all improve how we feel about our place in our world, how we impact the lives within our orbit, and how we can even improve the world in general. Ask your children, “What did the Dalai Lama say about kindness?” and most can recall, “Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible.” 

One of my favorite podcasts is an utterly amazing, inspiring, and now discontinued series called “Kind World.” Each piece is only four to six minutes long, but I found each more powerful than the last. The lead-in describes the podcast as illustrating that “Small acts of kindness may seem ordinary but are actually extraordinary and amazing to others. A smile, a helping hand, or simply listening can be as important as breakthrough therapies.” The episodes go on to tell the story of a single set of circumstances which illustrate how powerful a “simple” act of kindness can be. For example, the episode “Strangers at the Airport” tells the story of a young woman whose plane journey got interrupted in severe thunderstorms and how a family intervened to make her feel safe, cared for, and not alone during an overnight delay at a connecting airport. Even our first and second graders would be able to relate to what the family did to display kindness, how they initiated that kindness, and how their compassion made the young woman feel. They would realize that it doesn’t take big actions to show kindness and have an impact.

While many “Kind World” episodes are decidedly adult-oriented, by listening to them, we can gain a broader sense of how meaningful individual action can be. They give us an inspiring sense of how we can reach out to others – even total strangers – and make a difference in how they feel – and ultimately how we feel. And here’s a challenge worth setting: Can your family regularly reflect (weekly, for instance) on an action some family member took that was a particular act of kindness and the impact it had? Or, did someone treat “one of us” kindly and how did that make us feel?

While empathy can be an abstract concept for our small children, all understand the idea of kindness. It is an important habit to form, practice, and reflect upon. By flexing the kindness muscle more intentionally, we increase the likelihood of its positive impact, of meeting the promise of the Dalai Lama’s truth. 

Neil Mufson

                Even though Primary Day’s children are only between the ages of 4 and 8, my eye was drawn this summer to a Washington Post article entitled, “Adults Undervalue Teen Friendships.” While the piece pointed to guidelines for helping parents support their teen’s friendships, the article actually pointed towards “the PDS years” in promoting strong friendships, emotional stability, and satisfying, healthy connections to others.

                The writer of the article, Amy Laber-Warren, posited that close, positive peer relationships are as potent a force in adolescents’ lives as bad influences can be. In order to foster healthy decision-making and development, teens need at least one close friendship — to confide in, bounce things off of, and to be encouraged and held in check by. But the piece points out that parents often under value these kinds of connections in favor of what adults believe “augur success: doing well in school, helping around the house, participating in sports or community service… [Parents} tend to under-appreciate… the value of close teen friendships… Children who develop supportive, trusting relationships with others their age are more likely to become healthy, happy, and successful adults.”

                Some of the factors that can support teens in developing these kinds of relationships are equally important for Primary Day students. Consistent modeling of how to be a good friend and regularly talking about how to behave when presented with common friendship dilemmas are key ways parents can help children form good friendships themselves. Also, calmly talking through how to problem solve when inevitable peer conflicts develop is excellent practice for when run-of-the-mill quarrels arise. Laber-Warren also suggests welcoming children into your home as a way of fostering good friendships, and focusing on quality rather than quantity of friendships. Researchers have found that having a best friend or being popular do not correlate to future satisfying relationships, but having at least one or two good friends does.

                Strong friendships are part of what makes life optimally satisfying. Researchers have found that proactively helping children with the “slings and arrows” as well as joys of friendships now leads to greater “academic success, better mental health, more rewarding romantic relationships, and even better physical health” throughout life.

Primary Thoughts
Neil Mufson, Head of School

This school year we are engaging in a pilot initiative to bring the services of consulting psychologists to Primary Day. In the past several months, I have worked with Dr. Rebecca Resnik and Dr. Rachel Singer of Rebecca Resnik & Associates (RR & A), an extremely well-regarded local group of psychologists, to create a multi-faceted program to benefit all constituents of our school: students, faculty, and families.

To begin with, I wanted to make sure we were most effectively handling what psychologists are calling “fallout from the echo pandemic.” That is, I wanted us to be as proactive as possible in meeting any particular emotional and social issues that have arisen for our children due to the restrictions and disruptions of the pandemic. I wanted to have thought and action partners in providing prudent, research-based intervention strategies. This may be as simple as teaching the faculty to identify signs of emerging distress, or it may involve working with classes on topics such as stress reduction, mindfulness, worry, or social dynamics. The topics will be ever-evolving.

However, since I wanted our partnership to go beyond issues we’re seeing in the aftermath of the pandemic, RR & A will also serve as a resource for me, our Director of Teaching & Learning, our learning specialist, and our teachers when we are confronted with complex issues involving emotional health and well-being as well as complex learning issues. Our teams may seek insight when discussing challenging student situations. We may include a consulting psychologist in parent meetings, as appropriate, if you have given permission for your child to be observed.

Over time, RR & A will also lead teacher workshops to help us identify emerging mental health concerns and implement effective interventions within the classroom setting. Similarly they will conduct parenting workshops on topics such as fostering resilience in children, building children’s abilities to navigate social difficulties or setbacks, managing stressors related to parenting, empowering growing independence, or developing strategies to help children gain emotional awareness and regulation. I welcome your suggestions for other relevant topics.

Another very unique capability that RR & A will offer us is on-site therapy for individual students or small groups of students. Of course we would never have RR &A meet with your child individually without your permission, and RR & A will be offering these particular services at the parent’s expense, just as if the child were a client they saw at their site. However, two significant advantages are that receiving psychological services at school would be less disruptive to the child’s weekly routine, and students whom we refer will avoid long wait lists for service.

I will share more with you as our relationship with Rebecca Resnik & Associates develops. I anticipate inviting you to a parent program before our winter break.  

Primary Thoughts
Neil Mufson, Head of School

An “Ice Age of the Heart”?

Last week I mentioned that this summer the faculty read the book The Power of Kindness by Piero Ferrucci. In it, the author states that despite the discord, violence, tumult, and devastation that often pervade the news,

           “The fabric of our life is actually made of care, solidarity, [and] mutual service.

           These qualities are so embedded in our daily events that we may not even notice

           them. Yet to receive kindness does us good… [But] something similar happens

           on the other side of the equation: Giving kindness does us as much good as

           receiving it… Kind people are healthier and live longer, are more popular and

           productive, have greater success in business, and are happier than others.”

Since everyone’s experience suggests that humans are more likely to thrive in environments marked by kindness rather than conflict, our teachers this year will be paying even more mindful attention to ways we can model, emphasize, and expect kindness in our school community.

We also know that children learn best when home and school actively partner with one another. Hence I’d like to invite you to read Ferrucci’s book and to join a group of parents to discuss it in the library on November 15 from 8:30 - 9:15 a.m.

Kindness sounds so basic, yet as we rush about our lives, it can too easily not receive the emphasis it should receive. Ferrucci maintains that,

           “We all are in the midst of a ‘global cooling.’ Human relations are becoming

           colder. Communications are becoming more hurried and impersonal. Values

           such as profit and efficiency are taking on greater importance at the expense

           of human warmth and genuine presence. Family affections and friendships

           suffer and are less lasting. Signs of this decline are everywhere, visible

           especially when they touch us in the small catastrophes of life. You make

           a phone call to talk to a person and you hear a digital voice presenting a

           list of options… You wait for a letter from a friend and receive an email. The

           farm you love is gone, and in its place stands a cement building. You notice

           older people are not as well cared for and respected as they used to be.

           Your doctor concentrates on the test results instead of listening to you and

           looking at you. And rather than playing ball in the backyard, kids move in

           the virtual world of video games… I am convinced that we are going through

           an Ice Age of the heart… the causes of which are many: new living

           conditions and forms of work, the establishing of new technologies,

           the decline of the extended family, the great migrations in which

           people are uprooted from their birthplace, the weakening of values,

           the fragmentation and superficiality of the contemporary world, the

           accelerating pace of life.”

And all that was before the pandemic.

Amidst our lives in a world of exponential change, I look forward to exploring with you and other PDS parents how we can stand against this tide and ensure that our children are in the forefront of a renaissance of kindness in an all too shrill world.

Raising Readers
Neil Mufson, Head of School

In recently going through an old box of school materials, I came across a tongue-in-cheek “field note” in an old copy of The Hornbook, a journal about children’s books. Written by some friends and former colleagues, a husband and wife teaching team named Dean Schneider and Robin Smith, “Unlucky Arithmetic: Thirteen Ways to Raise a Non-Reader,” was a humorous outline of some of the things parents can do to discourage reading. Here are my favorites:

• Never read where your children can see you.
• Put a TV or computer in every room. Don’t neglect the bedrooms and kitchen.
• Correct your child every time she mispronounces a word.
• Schedule activities every day after school so your child will never be bored.
• Once your child can read independently, throw out the picture books. They’re for babies
• Don’t play board games together. Too dull.
• Give little rewards for reading. Stickers and plastic toys are nice. Money is even better.
• Under no circumstances read your child the same book over and over. She heard it once, she should remember it.
• Make sure your kids only read books that are “challenging.” Easy books are a complete waste of time. That goes double for comic books.

Dean and Robin point to some of what we need to provide for children if they are to become engaged, enthusiastic, life-long readers: models; some freedom from the clutter of screen and being over-scheduled; natural kinds of positive reinforcement; and the time and “space” to develop an intrinsic love of books and language. 

The acquisition of strong reading, comprehension, and critical reasoning skills, and developing a love of reading are some of the cornerstone goals of a Primary Day education. It is a joy and challenge for young children to unlock the code of written language. Yet is also both a joy and a challenge to cultivate the right conditions for young children to become avid readers. Parents and teachers must work against ubiquitous societal forces. Reading takes patience, time, focus, imagination, and commitment. There is no more important academic skill. Strong reading habits influence countless other competencies, such as the development of competent writing and critical thinking abilities. Reading is, after all, the bedrock that makes so much of our human experience possible. And, fortunately, when properly nurtured, it’s deeply satisfying and fun.  

Policy on Teacher Requests
Neil Mufson, Head of School

You will find that each year at this time, as we plan the next academic year and head into our spring parent conferences, I will remind families of an important school policy. As we set about formulating class lists for 2022-23, I ask that you not make requests for specific teachers. I strongly believe that both sections at each grade level offer students a great experience. In either class, your child ends up in excellent hands. Similarly, siblings will not necessarily be placed with the same teacher with whom older siblings were placed.

Many factors go into the creation of our class lists. We seek to create a balance of personalities, talents, temperaments, abilities, and learning styles within each section. We place the overall needs of the group as our primary consideration. As educators, we also clearly weigh what we see as individual needs. However, since the creation of a class is a very delicate and considered enterprise, we must take into account many issues more complex than individual wishes or perceptions.

Therefore, during upcoming conferences or at other times, I ask that you avoid putting teachers in the awkward position of making specific requests, which we cannot guarantee. This is not to say that you cannot offer your input as to the kind of classroom in which you feel your child best achieves. In the end, though, I ask that you trust the teachers and me since we truly have the children's best interests in mind. As always thank you for your cooperation and understanding.

“Keeping Imagination Alive”
Neil Mufson, Head of School

One of the hidden advantages of a school that serves only 4 to 8 year-olds is that within our walls, children’s imaginations are completely free and can be fully engaged. Even our oldest students can get engrossed in imaginative play. Beako and magic powder are natural extensions of our children’s imaginative worlds. Using one’s imagination is natural and fun, and allows kids to be kids for longer, especially without the presence of older children who can become more bound by “rational” thought.

In addition to emphasizing core academic subjects like math, reading, and writing, Primary Day makes sure students have ample opportunity to stretch not just emerging critical thinking skills but also imaginative and creative thinking. In Writers’ Workshop, we don’t worry too much about facts, even when we are learning about non-fiction. Our literature class in our beautiful library expands children’s horizons and imaginations, just as our Readers’ Workshop program does. STEM involves doing, problem solving, exploring, evaluating, and creating. Art and music introduce fundamental principles of these creative disciplines but let the children’s imagination and creativity make the concepts their own. Our playgrounds are blank canvases for the bountiful use of imagination.

A few years ago, I heard a speaker who said that if you ask a roomful of four year-olds to raise their hands if they are an artist, virtually every hand goes up. By the time children get to fourth grade, only about half see themselves as artists, and by seventh grade, it’s only a few. By keeping that creative confidence up and by regularly exercising imaginations, Primary Day expands children’s capacity to see themselves as creators and finders of unique solutions.

In a November opinion piece in The New York Times entitled, “The Awesome Importance of Imagination,” David Brooks pointed out that while Plato saw imagination as “an airy-fairy god,” Aristotle saw imagination as one of the foundations of all knowledge. Brooks remarked, “One tragedy of our day is that our culture hasn’t fully realized how much Aristotle is correct. Our society isn’t good at cultivating the faculty we may need the most.”

Brooks also quoted Darwin as writing imagination “unites former images and ideas, independently of the will, and thus creates brilliant and novel results.” Imagination allows us to generate alternate solutions and possibilities; envision others’ experiences; assess different perspectives; dream up new things; and shape the path of our own learning. These are but a few of the reasons Primary Day believes in giving the imagination lots of exercise and space.

Parent Night Remarks – 9.23.21
Neil Mufson, Head of School

Thanks so much for Zooming in tonight to gain a deeper sense of where and with whom your children spend such a significant piece of their day and to hear about the program, key goals, and procedures you’ll want to know so they will be ensured a great year.

I feel confident that you’ll come away from the evening feeling that your children are in exceptional hands, and that you’ve made the right investment to ensure that they have the benefit of the best possible education and foundation for these most important years.

I also hope, as a result of tonight, that you’ll be more likely to reach out to your child’s teacher when you have a concern or question, because that open communication, that engagement as parents in the educational process has consistently been found in the research to boost a child’s performance in school.

Tonight I wanted to share some thoughts with you on two topics. First, some of what I have noticed in my first weeks at PDS; and second, some small things I have found over the years that can have an outsized impact on the kind of student and person your child becomes.

But before I launch into that, I wanted to express my gratitude to you, most importantly for entrusting your children to us here at Primary Day. I take that trust as a sacred commitment we have to your child and to your family.

I also so appreciate all of your cooperation, understanding, and patience during these

extraordinarily challenging times. We are absolutely devoted to doing our best to ensure your child’s safety and that of our faculty and staff. Even when a vaccine is available for our children, we will remain vigilant, cautious, nimble, and prepared for the next twists and turns that the pandemic will bring. So thank you for all you are doing to comply with our protocols and for realizing that our children’s and our staff’s safety depends on all those little mindful decisions and observations you make along the way.

Thank you, too, for your patience as we work out our drop off and pick up procedures which are also based first on safety. Our fine-tuning of the afternoon pick up line has led to some real improvements, and we will soon be rolling out an app that will help further smooth things out in the morning.

As the faculty, staff, and I have welcomed your children Back to School, I have been struck by several things. First has been the absolute dedication and expertise of our faculty and staff. I see their deep developmental commitment at work every day. They lend amazing warmth and “kid knowledge” to their classrooms and routines, and their way with our students is so masterful that joy and purposefulness radiate from every learning space. Our teachers are real experts at the ages they teach, so be sure to make use of that expertise when you have questions or concerns about something your child is or is not doing. They know what’s normal, what works, what doesn’t work, what’s age appropriate, and they can offer a wealth of information, guidance, and reassurance.

I have also noticed that PDS children are exceptionally engaged, attuned, and eager. Their curiosity and energy seem boundless, and that kind of attitude toward school and learning is both infectious and palpable throughout the school. There’s an ebullient and happy hum that permeates this place, an underlying eagerness and motivation on the part of the children that prompts all to exercise their curiosity and to stretch themselves.

Community and kindness are also evident here. I have been so impressed by the care and respect your children show for one another.

Part of what makes Primary Day unique is that your child is part of a peer group that is uniformly attuned to the value of education, to doing their best, and to giving their all. I see and sense that every day. Of course as children get older, their peer group exerts an even stronger influence on them. But I very clearly see that PDS creates and capture this enormously positive side of peer influence that helps establish the right attitudes towards school.

When your children are surrounded by other children who have active and eager minds, when they’re happily engaged in a classroom where their teacher is a developmental, instructional, and child relationship expert who knows them so well, and when they come from homes which clearly prioritize education, they are bound to soar. That is what I see happening each day, even this early in the year.

I also would like to mention some seemingly small and perhaps obvious practices that you can put in place at home to enhance your child’s growing independence, sense of responsibility, and positive approach to learning and to life. I’d like to focus tonight on 3 simple things that eventually pay very powerful returns.

First, make sure you increasingly allow your children to do things on their own. Whether it’s cleaning up their toys after playing (like they do here), putting toothpaste on their toothbrush, or gathering their things to be ready to hop out of the car at morning drop off, consider giving them regular responsibilities or simple chores around the house. For instance, have them take on straightening their bed in the morning, helping with choosing or packing their lunch, making sure that their backpack is properly loaded and in the right place so it can just be grabbed in the morning, or sharing or reading stories with younger siblings. Take a look at how your household works, and find some authentic tasks they can regularly undertake that are truly helpful and that they can do consistently. Gradually add steps or complexity to these tasks as time goes on.

Of course it often is easier and more efficient to just do these things yourself, but look for what your children might be able to do more independently or how they can help. Model what you expect
and then let them do it consistently. Then build from these smaller pieces to more complete tasks. Young children like having responsibility, they are proud of showing you what they are capable of,
and it builds their independence, feelings of mastery, and sense of agency, which is their sense that they can influence their environment.

Obviously, developmental appropriateness is the key. You wouldn’t ask a PK child to load the dishwasher after dinner every evening. But you might ask him or her to do the basic setting of the table (at least of non-breakable or non-sharp things), or you might ask them to put their dirty clothes in the hamper, or to place their shoes in the right place so they can be found easily the next day.

A book written over a decade ago by Los Angeles psychologist Wendy Mogel called The Blessing of a Skinned Knee has emerged as a classic on making sure we are leading our children to become responsible, resilient, and independent. Mogel points out that if we don’t require our children to do things for themselves, if we don’t hold them accountable, if we don’t ask them to help out with reasonable, age-appropriate chores at home, we inadvertently risk disabling them for the future. 

Similarly she points out if we consistently make things too easy for our children, if we regularly pamper, indulge, or overprotect them, if we too quickly jump in to “rescue” them, or assign blame elsewhere, their development into healthy, independent young people will become compromised.  As she wrote, too many parents of our demographic, “in their eagerness to do right by their children, overindulge them materially, spoil them emotionally, [and] inadvertently inhibit their development of responsibility.” So we have to find those small steps when they are young, when they are at the ages of Primary Day students.

Another small but a very powerful routine – one that admittedly may be difficult to ensure is in place -- is to have dinner together as a family as many times a week as you possibly can. Not too long ago, I heard a podcast from Harvard’s Graduate School of Education that interviewed a family therapist named Anne Fishel, who directs an entity called The Family Dinner Project. We all know that there are tons of reasons families don’t or can’t have dinner together. But the salubrious impacts of regularly having family dinners are nothing less than astounding. Fishel reported, “There have been more than 20 years of dozens of studies that document that family dinners are great for the body, physical health, the brain, academic performance, and mental health.” In addition to the nutritional benefits, “Kids who grow up having family dinners, later, when they're on their own, tend to eat more healthily and to have lower rates of obesity.” And then she goes on to say this: “The mental health benefits are just incredible. Regular family dinners are associated with lower rates of [childhood and adolescent] depression, anxiety, substance abuse, eating disorders, tobacco use, early teenage pregnancy, and higher rates of resilience” and feelings of self worth. All this just by making sure your family eats together regularly.

There are other simple, regular practices that also have huge pays off that I recommend and that I’ll talk about in the months and years ahead, things like developing a habit of regularly expressing gratitude; establishing an organized and consistent approach to doing homework; being on time; building intrinsic rather than extrinsic motivation whenever possible; having a discipline system at home that is based on natural consequences, much like the one we have in place here at school; modeling and expecting empathy; and being certain to provide your child with predictable, consistent, age-appropriate routines.

One last seemingly small thing that leads to outsized benefits that I want to mention tonight is something you are probably already doing but that you should aim to continue for many years into the future: having a regular reading or story time with your child or whole family. This is relatively easy to put in place as part of a regular bed time routine, but it is something you should hold onto even when your child is an independent and sophisticated reader, maybe in the form of a family reading time.

The national statistics are damning. Studies find that 33% of American high school graduates never read another whole book the rest of their lives; 42% of American college graduates never read another book; and 80% of American families do not read, borrow, or purchase a book in a typical year.

When I was a kid, just about every night my father would tell me a bedtime story. For me, he created a fictional universe around Cubby Bear, a character I think he remembered from childhood bedtime stories and books. For my sister he created another character named Longnose Hufflefinger (which are evidently a type of tropical fish) but in this version was a person. For his granddaughters he created stories about a character named Pocket. Every night my father wasn’t traveling for work, I was told the latest adventure of Cubby Bear and his best friend Montmorency Percival Clarence Gopher, who when introduced was always met with the line, “My word, your name is longer than you are.”

The stories were simple and I believe were improvised. I am sure my father had no idea of the numerous and powerful benefits of these stories.Yes, they bonded us.Yes, they made me and my sister feel special, valued, and loved. And yes, it was a considerable investment of my father’s time. But now research shows that listening to stories or regular reading improves brain connectivity; increases vocabulary, comprehension, and memory; empowers the ability to empathize with other people; aids in sleep readiness; reduces stress; lowers blood pressure and heart rate; fights depression symptoms throughout life; and eventually prevents cognitive decline. All that from the reading habit!

Think about the impact of pairing that with the power of family dinners and giving your children meaningful responsibilities around home. In these times when there is so much uncertainty, it is reassuring as parents to know that inserting some simple practices into our routines can allow us to seize some control over some very important outcomes. Confidence and competence are indeed built through small steps, steps that have been modeled and practiced.

I am very much looking forward to meeting you in person at one of our upcoming parent coffees, but I would also welcome having an outdoor visit or a Zoom chat. Be sure to contact me if there ever is anything with which I can help you. In the meantime, know that I am looking forward to meeting you somewhere other than in the drop off or pick up line.Thank you again for joining us this evening.

Primary Thoughts
New Beginnings
Neil Mufson, Head of School

I often wonder if I were destined to be in schools for so much of my life because I carry such strong memories of my own early schooling. I can still picture walking into the classroom on my own first day of Kindergarten. Mrs. Beaulieu was at the door to greet us and seamlessly separate us from our parents. She then directed us to play on the huge locomotive and train cars that occupied half of our very large room and that she had fashioned out of very large boxes and construction paper. Soon we were playing, forming nascent friendships, and taking the first steps towards independence from our parents. It was an exhilarating new beginning, at least for most of us.

In schools we are so fortunate to have abundant new beginnings. There is the start of the new school year, the start of the new calendar year, and the start of Spring with its resplendent signs of new life. Summer also brings its own start of consolidating gains, adjusting to a less structured routine, and making the most of plentiful opportunities for fun, fresh air, and new activities, places, and people.

With young learners especially, actually every day brings the promise of a new journey. This is part of what I love about working with these ages. There are constantly new connections, new learning, new questions, new discoveries, and new skills introduced and mastered. One factor that drew me to PDS for my own new beginning is the way the school embraces all the possibility and joy of this stage of life while remaining grounded by the deepest expertise in what our young learners most need.

Your children’s days at Primary Day this school year, like the 76 prior years at PDS, will nourish their bounding intellects, their expanding sense of what it means to be a community member, and their growing practice of what it means to be a lifelong, fully engaged learner. Their days will be full, their minds engaged, their joyful spirits nurtured. Of course academics will be important, but where we will also excel will be in partnering with you to help develop good people.

I often think of that seemingly larger-than-life cardboard train of my own first day of “real” school and the journey that was ahead. At PDS we are beginning, supporting, and boosting your children’s lifetime voyage of schooling, with all its promise, all its excitement, and all its beginnings. The faculty, staff, and I are here to guide your children and you with all the twists and turns ahead. Please be sure to call on us when you have a question, concern, or idea. We will do the same. In the meantime, know that I am so grateful that you and your family are “all aboard.”

The Primary Day School 2018 Gala Committee invites you to attend "An Evening in Neverland." Friday, April 27, 2018 at 6:30 p.m. at Badlands Playspace. Purchase tickets now at: https://theprimarydayschool.org/support/.  
Sponsorship opportunities are available to support PDS. Please contact Dillon Cox in the Advancement Office at d.cox@theprimarydayschool.org.

It was wonderful to see so many familiar faces at this year's Winter Wonderland.  Welcome back alums and we hope to see more of you soon!

On Friday, November 17, Primary Day invited our cherished Grandparents and Special Friends for a wonderful morning of celebration.

Primary Day is proud to honor the brave men and woman who have fought America's battles, past and present, as part of our annual Veteran's Day program. We were honored to have the Walter Reed National Military Medical Center Color Guard and many veterans attend the program this year.

Is the engineer in you looking for an opportunity to explore and create! If you are a prospective family considering Primary Day, we invite you and your child to join us for Get Caught Engineering on Sunday Nov. 5. Email us at a.collins@theprimarydayschool.org. Hope to see you soon! Please share!

Friday’s Primary Day Pig Parade was a perfectly pleasant performance by the Pre-K!! #fantasticfriday

Celebrating our Second Graders at Graduation was bittersweet. We will miss their thoughtfulness, their smiles, and their creativity. Current parent and PDS alum, Emily Gerson, shared lovely thoughts with the students. Students and their families also heard from Mr. Lawrence and their second grade teachers, Mrs. Muldoon and Mrs. McCormick. We wish them all well in their next steps!

Pre-K students dazzled us this morning with their songs and dancing. What a delight it was to have our youngest students perform onstage for friends and family.

Kindergartners delighted their audience with "Viva Mexico!," a musical culmination of their unit on Mexico. The program included dances, presentations and songs in Spanish and English. After the show, students decimated pinatas on the playground. Students enjoyed a maravilloso tapas feast for lunch.

Primary Day invites children, aged 2 & 3 and their caregivers to a Story and Music Hour led by our librarian and music teacher. Bring a favorite stuffed animal and join us on May 18 from 9:30-10:30am. Please RSVP to 301-365-4355 or RSVP@ThePrimaryDaySchool.org. Primary Day is located at 7300 River Road. We look forward to seeing you!

This year's Gala theme was Where the Wild Things Are. On Friday, April 21st, parents, faculty and staff enjoyed a wild rumpus at Bethesda Country Club. It was a wonderful night, with many fun things to bid on, great food to eat, fun music to dance to, and fantastic friends to catch up with. Many thanks to the Chair, Jen Kavounas, and her monstrous helpers!

Primary Day invites children, aged 2 & 3 and their caregivers to a Story and Music Hour led by our librarian and music teacher. Bring a favorite stuffed animal and join us either on April 20 or May 18 from 9:30-10:30am. Please RSVP to 301-365-4355 or RSVP@ThePrimaryDaySchool.org. Primary Day is located at 7300 River Road. We look forward to seeing you!

Discover Primary Day at our last Open House of the season on Sunday, January 8, 2017 from 1:00-3:00 pm. Childcare and refreshments will be provided while you explore our unique school. There are opportunities to talk with faculty, parents, and alums while learning more about our signature programs: Phonovisual, World Languages, EcoWonder & STEM, Technology, Balanced Literacy, Math, and Art & Music. If you are unable to attend this Open House, please call 301.365.4355 to set up an individual tour of the school.

We were honored to have the Walter Reed National Military Medical Center Color Guard and many veterans attend our annual Veterans Day Program. Students sang "God Bless America," "America," and "Veterans Day" among other patriotic choices.

In conjunction with the publication of Montgomery Modern, by Clare Kelly, Primary Day is pleased to welcome the Montgomery Modern tour group on October 8, 2016. Ms. Kelly recently published this award-winning book, which features both historic and current views of Montgomery County buildings including narrative on each. Ms. Kelly has organized a bus tour of several of the buildings featured in her book, including Primary Day. This bus tour explores the Montgomery County work of Deigert and Yerkes, a leading modernist architecture firm in the Washington, DC area, best known for the National Arboretum Administration Building. Operating from 1947 to 1967, the partnership of Robert Campbell Deigert and David Norton Yerkes, created distinctive designs with variety in materials and textures, surprising angles, and contrasting spaces. Tour participants will enjoy a tour of the school and have lunch following in the Schoolfield Library. More information about the tour may be found at www.montgomeryplanning.org/.

Celebrating our Second Graders at Graduation was bittersweet. We will miss their thoughtfulness, their smiles, and their creativity. Current parent, Jean-Marie Fernandez, shared a wonderful letter Beako wrote to the students. Students and their families also heard thoughts from Mrs. Geppert and their second grade teachers, Mrs. Muldoon and Mrs. McCormick. We wish them all well in their next steps!

Pre-K students dazzled us this morning with their songs and dancing. What a delight it was to have our youngest students perform onstage for friends and family.

Kindergartners delighted their audience with "Viva Mexico!," a musical culmination of their unit on Mexico. The program included dances, presentations and songs in Spanish and English. After the show, students decimated pinatas on the playground. Students enjoyed a maravilloso tapas feast for lunch. An added bonus was our graduating senior alums who turned out in droves to enjoy the show and relive their times here at PDS.

The Class of 2011 and their parents had a wonderful time connecting over bowling.

It was a special treat to meet animals from the Maryland Zoo. In addition to learning about various ways animals move, we observed a parrot, rabbit, owl, and penguin.

Discover Primary Day at our last Open House of the season on Sunday, January 10, 2016 from 1:00-3:00 pm. Refreshments and childcare will be provided while you explore our unique school. There are opportunities to talk with faculty, parents, and alums while learning more about our signature programs: Phonovisual, World Languages, EcoWonder & STEM, Technology, Balanced Literacy, Math, and Art & Music. If you are unable to attend this Open House, please call 301.365.4355 to set up an individual tour of the school.

We were honored to have the Walter Reed National Military Medical Center Color Guard and many veterans attend our annual Patriotic Program. Students sang "God Bless America," "You're a Grand Old Flag," and "Stars and Stripes Forever" among other patriotic choices.

Rain couldn't dampen spirits on our annual Field Day! Children pizza box relayed, sprinted, freeze-danced, and egg-and-spoon raced inside. Thank you to Ms. Perez and the faculty/staff for making this such a wonderful culminating year-end event!

Second Graders worked for weeks to detail their amazing and hilarious life journeys in their autobiographies. They enjoyed sharing their work with family and friends at the annual Authors' Tea.

The First Graders’ exploration of countries around the world came to a close with their International Program. The show featured folktales from different countries. Students performed skits of "Jamie O’Rourke and the Giant Potato" (an Irish folktale), "The Gifts of Wali Dad" (an Indian folktale), "The Jade Stone" (a Chinese folktale about the importance of creativity and expressing your voice), and "A Caterpillar’s Voice" (an East African folktale that suggests that you don’t have to be big in stature to have a lot of courage). Each group of performers then sang a traditional song from that culture. Following the production the children enjoyed an international feast, featuring the cuisine of the countries studied.

It was a perfect day to dedicate the Nadonley Circle on Saturday! We heard words from past parents, former faculty, alums, board members and the Head of School about the warmth and dedication of both Carter-Anne and Ray Nadonley.

As a culminating activity in their study of Colonial America, Second Graders lived Colonial History by performing for their parents and by participating in Colonial Trunk Day. They began the day by presenting colonial songs, dances, and childhood singing games for their delighted audience. This fun was followed by Colonial Trunk Day, coordinated and staffed by Second Grade parents, which included a wide range of hands-on-activities: candle making and wallpaper printing; writing with quill pens; grinding coffee and corn; making butter and tasting Johnnycakes; playing colonial games; and creating corn husk dolls.

Discover Primary Day at our last Open House of the season on Sunday, January 11, 2015 from 1:00-3:00 pm. Refreshments and childcare will be provided while you explore our unique school. There are opportunities to talk with faculty, parents, and alums while learning more about our signature programs: Phonovisual, World Languages, EcoWonder & STEM, Technology, Balanced Literacy, Math, and Art & Music. If you are unable to attend this Open House, please call 301.365.4355 to set up an individual tour of the school.

We were honored to have both the Walter Reed National Military Medical Center Color Guard as well as many veterans attend our annual Patriotic Music Program this year. Students sang "My Country 'Tis of Thee," "The Army Goes Rolling Along," and "Anchor's Away" among other patriotic choices. Please visit Primary Day's YouTube channel to view a few snippets.

Elsas, Marios, gorillas, and more were at Primary Day today for Halloween. We celebrated with a Spooktacular Beako and Parade!

On October 1, 2014, our renovated music room was dedicated to Mr. Bennett Boskey, former Board of Trustees Chair and devoted champion of Primary Day. The children sang a special song in honor of Mr. Boskey which was recorded and will be presented to him along with a thank you card signed by all the children and staff.

Mr. Bennett Boskey was quietly at the helm of The Primary Day School since its beginning years. Although he was in the background, his mark was indelibly stamped on the school. He served on the school's board from 1954 until 2012 and was the Chairman for many of those years. 

In 1954, Mr. Boskey was a young attorney with a general law practice and a friendship with Robert C. Diegert, Chairman of Primary Day's Board of Directors. Mr. Diegert asked "a favor" of Mr. Boskey, following which Mr. Boskey became a member of the Board of Directors and legal counsel to the school. Mr. Boskey provided much needed legal guidance and direction to Mr. Diegart and Mr. David Yerkes, the architects of the original school building. Mr. Boskey helped them with the organization of the school as a nonprofit corporation, the acquisition of the land, the funding of the building project, the arrangements for construction of the school and the establishment of a foundation to support the school (because the school was turned down by local banks because it was a "single purpose building").

According to Mr. Boskey, the school, having no assets, could not secure a bank loan for the construction of the building. Even while many parents, trustees, and friends of the school were discouraged, Mr. Boskey and his friends were undeterred, determined to find a way to build the building that PDS children deserved. With Mr. Boskey's leadership in 1954, a small group of parents, along with a friend of the school, guaranteed the loan that made it possible to proceed with the construction of the school building. So, Mr. Boskey was one of the individuals responsible for Primary Day's existence today. It is notable that Mr. Boskey and his beloved wife Shirley, whom he has survived, did not have children.
Mr. Boskey never wavered from his commitment to Primary Day. He led every major decision since he assumed the chairmanship of the Board, decades ago, until 2012.

Primary Day is forever indebted to Mr. Boskey for his love for the children of Primary Day and for his life-long devotion to this wonderful school.

It was the perfect day for Pig's Party on the playground at Primary Day! Each year our Pre-K students celebrate learning the first sound on the Phonovisual Chart with a parade, pink and purple polka dotted hats, pink pasta necklaces, pounding on percussion instruments, pizza, popcorn, and popsicles.

We had a blast at Field Day this year! Children were treated to freeze dancing, soccer, balloon-popping, pizza box relays, the 50-yard dash, basketball, sidewalk chalk, bubbles, silly string, the Good Humor Truck and more. Thanks to Ms. Perez, all the faculty/staff, and parent volunteers for making this such a wonderful culminating year-end event!

Second Graders worked for weeks on their autobiographies. They enjoyed sharing them with family and friends this morning at their Authors' Tea. What amazing and hilarious journeys they have had!

The First Graders’ exploration of countries around the world came to a close last week with their International Program. This year's program featured folk tales from different countries. They performed skits of "Jamie O’Rourke and the Giant Potato" (an Irish folktale), "The Gifts of Wali Dad" (an Indian folktale), "The Four Dragons" (a Chinese folktale about how the four rivers in China are formed), and "A Caterpillar’s Voice" (an East African folktale that suggests that you don’t have to be big in stature to have a lot of courage). Each group of performers then sang a traditional song from that culture. Following the production the children enjoyed an international feast, featuring the cuisine of the countries studied.

Our Kindergartners delighted their audience with "Viva Mexico!," a musical culmination of their unit on Mexico. The program included dances, presentations and songs in Spanish and English. A fabulous tapas feast followed the program. 

Our Phonovisual Specialist, Lynn Najaka, is the 2014 recipient of The Washington Post Agnes Meyer Outstanding Teacher Award. The Award is given annually to only one private school teacher in the DC area who exemplifies excellence in their profession. Agnes Meyer, a staunch supporter and defender of education, was the wife of Eugene Meyer, who purchased the Post in 1933. The award recognizes excellence in teaching and encourages creative and quality instruction. It is given to educators who contribute in substantive ways to the improvement of education in the Washington metropolitan area. 

Lynn is featured in The Washington Post Magazine Education issue. Additionally, she will receive a monetary award and will be honored at an awards ceremony at The Washington Post on Tuesday, May 13. In response to winning the award, Lynn writes “It is such an honor to share my love of learning with the students and families at Primary Day. I am truly honored to have been nominated for this award by Primary Day and am so humbled to have won.” Please visit the Washington Post website to read more about the award and Mrs. Najaka.

As a culminating activity in their study of Colonial America, our Second Graders participated in Colonial Trunk Day activities. Colonial Trunk Day, coordinated and staffed by Second Grade parents , included a display of historical artifacts followed by a wide range of hands-on-activities: candle making and wallpaper printing; writing with quill pens; grinding coffee and corn; making butter and tasting Johnnycakes; playing colonial games; and creating corn husk dolls.

We were treated to a special performance by Tammy Turner today at our Peace and Freedom Beako. Tammy is a local recording artist who has performed all over the world. She performed "What A Wonderful World" with the help of the students and accompanied the whole community on our final song, "We Shall Overcome." 

We had a wonderful time showing off our school to Grandparents and Special Friends on Friday!

In conjunction with their study of Native Americans, our Kindergarten students took a field trip last week to the National Museum of the American Indian. They had a wonderful time and particularly enjoyed their time in the ImagiNations Activity Center!

Witches, goblins, ghosts, and more were at Primary Day this week to celebrate Halloween. We had no tricks, only wonderful treats!

Please join us for Beako's Book Fair and Fall Festival. The Book Fair is held on October 24 (2:00-3:15pm), October 25 (8:00-9:00am and 2:00-3:15pm), and October 26 (10:00am - 2:00pm). The Fall Festival is on October 26 (10:00am - 2:00pm).  You may register for the Fall Festival in advance either by sending your form and check to school or online by October 21, 2013. 

Beako has been making the rounds with Mrs. Geppert this week to meet/remeet all the students and to remind them about his Golden Rule!

PDS's Backpack Project went off without a hitch! In late spring, with parents' and staff's gracious donations, children helped to fill 30 brand-new backpacks with school supplies. On August 28, with the support of 4 of our students as well as a few older siblings, PDS, along with the Backpack Project, Inc., helped to personally give 30 students from Ketchum Elementary School in Washington DC, their very own brand new backpack. The Ketchum students and staff were thrilled with our donation and indicated that we were the first school whose students actually participated in the distribution of the backpacks. We look forward to supporting the Backpack Project, Inc. again next year.

The Second Graders had a wonderful time with Valerie Tripp, author of many American Girl books. Ms. Tripp shared stories of her life, explained the writing process, and encouraged our young writers. It was quite a treat!

As the culminating activities in their study of Colonial America, our Second Graders enthusiastically participated in Colonial Day activities and presented a Colonial Music Program.

The Colonial Days, coordinated and staffed by Second Grade parents , included a display of historical artifacts followed by a wide range of hands-on-activities: candle making and wallpaper printing; writing with quill pens; grinding coffee and corn; making butter and tasting Johnnycakes; playing colonial games; and creating corn husk dolls.

The Second Graders arrived at school on Thursday, dressed in colonial attire for their Colonial Music Program.   The audience delighted in the presentation of colonial songs, dances and childhood singing games.

According to our teachers,the children had a wonderful time writing Seuss-inspired poetry and enjoying Seuss treats on Friday!

Pre-K made Green Eggs and Ham to celebrate Dr. Seuss’ Birthday. First Graders measured with nonstandard units using their feet to go with The Foot Book! Second Graders and their Kindergarten book buddies celebrated Dr. Seuss’ birthday by reading books, making Thing and Thing 2 hats together, and snacking on one fish two fish red fish blue fish…Swedish fish of course! Fun was had by all!

Spirit week is in full force. Everyone has gotten in on the action on Sock Day, Primary Colors Day, and Pajama Day.Tomorrow is Disco day and we can't wait to see the outfits that come through the door! We're sure to be wowed.

After a fabulous week of hunting, setting traps, and learning all about the Primary Day building, our newest students found those wily Gingerbread Men. Now there is nothing left to do but eat them!

Primary Day students, parents and faculty recently delighted in "Viva Mexico!," a musical culmination of the Kindergarten unit on Mexico.  The program included dances, presentations and songs in Spanish and English.   The Kindergartners celebrated with a Mexican feast following the program.  Art projects completed during the unit included woven placements, vases containing paper flowers, the outfits the children wore during the program, and cactus paintings, pyramids and parrots which served as stage decorations. The unit also included Spanish lessons, the study of Mexican culture, geography, agriculture, customs and money. Another favorite activity was the Fruit Market created at school, where the children ordered a wide variety of fruit, in Spanish, and paid for their order in pesos.

The Second Grade study of France culminated in a musical production, “La Tour de France”.  As four “tourists” traveled the French countryside they encountered “French citizens” who eagerly shared their culture.

The students led us through the Bordeaux region where we learned how grapes are grown, then visited a nearby café; traveled on the Train a Grande Vittesse to the Provence Region, visited the Cote d’Azur, basked in the beauty of the flowers in Grasse, and marveled at the Sur Le Pont d’Avignon, the bridge across the Rhone River.  Then it was off to Giverny, to see where Claude Monet painted his “Gardens and Water Lilies” Series.  The finale of the program was a visit to a French classroom where the Second Graders demonstrated their acquired French vocabulary during a delightfully energetic song.  Following the program, students enjoyed a buffet containing favorites of French cuisine and everyone delighted in viewing the Second Graders’ artwork in the halls, inspired by Monet and Matisse.

For twenty years Primary Day families have generously provided holiday gifts for the children served by Chapel Forge Center in Bowie, Maryland. This year's donations included hundreds of new and gently used toys, books and articles of clothing.   The response to this year’s collection was overwhelming and served to remind us all that small individual actions truly do make a difference.